Thinking isn’t as easy as it seems

From the minute we wake up till the minute we fall asleep our brains work producing thoughts faster than we can speak them; actually even while we sleep our brains keep on working. So you would think with all that practice we would be really good at it!

But at the start of this year, when finally, the kids are back in school and I have time to work - I struggle to gather my thoughts. There are quite a few projects that require some good thinking; setting of goals, creative new strategies that are needed, practical steps, etc. You know what I’m talking about…

Nancy Kline, in her book ‘Time to Think’ (1999) explains that we don’t take time out enough to sit and think, especially with an attentive listener, because we say that we are too busy, rushed and stressed. But good thinking is worth it’s time and will give back manifold. Think about all the mistakes you’ve made in the past that you could have avoided if you had thought about it well beforehand. She also says that “The best conditions for thinking, if you really stop and notice, are not tense. They are gentle. They are quiet. They are unrushed. They are stimulating, but not competititve, they are encouraging.” (p. 37)

Looking back at my life I know that the times I did my best thinking, was when I was allowed to think out loud, with somebody listening attentively. That was either a good friend, my husband, colleague or a more formal process like a mentorship, coach or intervision process. Good listening, no interruptions and good questions were the key to unlock my good thinking.

xpand, the organisation I work for (www.xpand.eu), offers a workshop that we call Intervision 7; in that workshop we train groups of people how to help one of their members think through a problem he/she is experiencing by listening well, asking good questions and giving feedback through an organized process that only last 1 hour! The thinking and listening will be of high quality, imagine doing this routinely in your organization and what positive changes that could bring.  

So tonight I think I will instruct my husband to listen and not interrupt (let’s see how that goes!) and I plan to do my best thinking of 2016 so far! 

Renske Fitjzohn

Source: Kline, Nancy (1999) Time to Think – Listening to ignite the human mind. London, UK Octopusbooks